Why did the math book look sad at the party?
It was surrounded by numbers but still felt like it didn’t add up.
—
I once met a tree that was so lazy, it refused to grow any taller. I told it, “You really need to branch out a bit more!”
—
My friend asked if I wanted to go skydiving. I said, “Why jump out of a perfectly good airplane when I can fly first class and land safely?”
—
I heard the sun complaining to the moon, “Why do you get to rest while I have to work all day?” The moon replied, “Because you shine so brightly, I can afford to take a break.”
—
Some people say diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but have you ever tried to have a deep conversation with a rock? It’s like talking to a wall.
—
I saw a turtle trying to race a hare, and I thought, “Why rush when you can enjoy the journey at your own pace?”
—
My grandmother is so old, I swear she’s been around since the dinosaurs. I asked her once, “Did you ever ride a triceratops to school?” She just laughed and said, “No, but I did have a pet pterodactyl!”
—
I saw a man trying to fix a broken heart with duct tape. I told him, “You might want to try something a bit more adhesive, like love and understanding.”


Leave a Reply